Up from the bottom! Recovery Part 1

Over the last 15-20 years, I have been on quite a journey. It started with a broken back and pain medication. At the peek of my pain medicine, I was taking a 40mg oxycobtin 4 times a day and a 5mg percocet also 4 times a day. That was what the prescription was. But it wasn't long before they where not working the same and they wouldn't up my doses, but I did. I was starting to run out early and I had to buy them off the street to make it through. When I couldn't do that, what a horrible few days I had to deal with.

I took a traveling supt job and it wasn't long before my doctor was harder to see and eventully he "fired" me. Basically he was done helping me and I was left with no other recourse. I was out of town, I was in serious withdrawel. I happened to be in Philly and someone told me to go downtown and ask for heroin. I was very apprehensive but I needed to feel better. Not only withdrawing, but serious pain as well. So I did it.

A year goes by, I was laid off so I went back to my original job. After 6 months, I was let go from there too. I was unable to pay rent, and one day we got in the car, I remember siting in the driveway thinking, this is our new home. And over the next 5 years we lived in the car, lost the car and lived in a tent wherever we could, we got help getting an apartment but after the first month, we had to pay cash because some stuff got dropped, and Melinda was the only one getting cash to pay.  She made it last 6 months but we were out again.

     We lost probably 5 cars and we lost 2 apartments both apartments were the same.  No one would pay but Melinda when it came to cash.  Not her resposibility to pay for all the adults and off we were again.  In the street.  

     After some time, we decided to change things.  We went to the diversion center and waited for a bed at a recovery place.

I will write part 2 after a little bit.   That is the end of part one

The Wild One

For any one who knows the true way a family with more than one kid works, there is a generalization about the personality of each kid that rings true with 90% of the families in the U.S.  The first kid being the golden child, the one who tries to make Mom and Dad proud.  The over achiever.  This is the child that was born first, so has gotten lot's of attention from the parents and grows up (mostly) just fine.

The second child now has to find a way to get some of that attention.  So to counteract the first child, this one is usually the wild one.  The one who tries drugs, smoking, drinking, pushing the rules.  Negative attention is still attention.  This one is always getting into trouble.  Always pushing the limits.

Third child needs to find their own way to get some attention.  You have the over achiever, you have the wild one, so, what else is there to do but be VERY independent.  Also generally very helpful.  No need to worry because this child sees the second one doing all the rough stuff, so this child wants to be the ANGEL.  Might try a few things, but on a very small scale if at all.  Usually HATES that the second child is doing the things they are doing.  Very opinionated and seemingly set in their ways and an unusually young age.

If there is a fourth, that one could very likely be the loner.  Absolutely independent, out on their own doing their own thing.  A mix of all the first three, plus the one to take care of themselves.

Of course, I do not know anyone who reads this, but I bet I am pretty close.  And handling each one of these personalities is a big challenge to most parents.  It is not easy.